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I am probably one of the happiest girls ever. While I know I’m not “in love,” I am particularly happy because of B. Since my parents met him at my sister’s graduation in May they surprisingly liked him a lot (a loooong time ago I dated him, and my parents hated him. according to them he was too old for me, while in reality he isn’t that old and he is pretty much as immature as I am). Well finally in May my mom insisted they meet him (they were meeting my other friends as well) since he has been my friend for so long. I was super freaked out about this, hell I even had ridiculously bad dreams about it. So when everything went great it kind of made my month.
When we moved E out of the house in our college town B ended up helping us move her furniture (he lives in the small, hippie, college town year-round). This was greatly appreciated by all of us (and for me, who wouldn’t want someone trying to grab their ass while they vacuum). So when E, my mom, and I returned once more to the town on Wednesday to pick up our car that had broken down, we invited B to come to an early dinner with us. Once again I was kind of nervous but dying to see him.
Dinner went amazingly well. We were all laughing and talking loudly after 5 minutes (my mom seriously fits in well with my friends. I’m hoping when I’m her age I can be that fun). As usual, I got super tipsy. Just one pint of McSorley’s Ale and I was a giggling mess (I of course got a second one though). Later, on the way home, my mom commented on how attractive B is and how nice and tall he is. B is 6’3″ so he towers above my 5’7″. The rest of my family is fairly tall though (my sister is 6 feet tall) and being tall is an attractive thing to them (I have to agree as I’m generally attracted to tall guys). Overall, I was basically just surprised that she was so complimentary about him. I never imagined my parents could get along with B so well.
N seemed pretty much as close to perfect as a guy can come, but somehow our whole relationships is thrown completely off balance. What started as a problem of me worrying when he was out with a friend, who is a girl, on the beach all evening has turned into a huge double standard. I’ve known him and I remember talking to him about the whole girl friend thing. I asked if we would stop talking if he ever dated someone (before any physical stuff or type of dating between us). His answer was a firm no. His words were something along the lines, “all my friends are girls so she would just have to get over it.”
So, maybe I can deal with him having girl friends but I’m really not sure about this girl he hungout with. They hungout in the beginning of the school year in 2008. She had a boyfriend, she and N somehow met at the mall where he worked in a store. They went out to bars and hungout I guess. Then this girl tried to commit suicide, but it wasn’t real. Purely for attention. She took pills when she was with a friend and N I think. That’s pure attention getting. That isn’t I don’t want to be here anymore. N had something to do with helping her get to a hospital I think. After that he didn’t hear from her for months until last week.
She called him with ex problems… She’s single and evidently needs N to lean on… needy girl. I know how this story goes so is there any point to write more? If you’re reading this, at this point you know what I mean I am sure. So she comes out of the blue and calls him and talks for an hour on the phone. I didn’t like the sound of it but then was like well she does live 5 hours away and he wouldn’t do anything. Then on Sunday he texts me and say “I’m going down to the beach tomorrow night.” I was like what the hell? “what do you mean? do you mean tonight?” His reply, “My friend is in town with her mom and sister and wants to hangout. She wanted to tonight but since it’s Father’s Day I told her I couldn’t.” I was like hmmm odd… Later I find that she is moving to the area where he lives to go to school in August. Sounds promising.
I asked questions to find out that it was the girl from the week before, with all her ex problems. He hadn’t seen or heard from her and now voila! here she is single and needing someone to fix her (my boyfriend…possibly ex now loves messed up people. I truly and honestly know this and I despite all my issues am not a messed up person. I don’t need him. I don’t need his help.) I of course was like okay… but it did bother me. Our little bad-mood-time/fight began and continued all Monday. When he told me he was meeting her in a little bit I was like well have fun (it was 6:30pm). He texted me last and I stopped. Finally it gets to 10:00 and he hasnt texted. He also told me he wasn’t staying out late because he has work. He usually goes to sleep at 11 for work. I texted him and asked if he was back. “Not yet hunny, but I’m coming in soon.” Me: “what are you two up to?” Him: “just hanging out” Me: “I meant like more of like where are you and stuff.” (was that bad to say?…) Him: “at the beach.”
I stopped left him alone. It gets to 11 his usual bedtime for work and remember he wasn’t staying out late. It’s been nearly 4 and half hours. I text him again: “are you home yet?” Him: “No but leaving soon.” Me: “Well I want some of your time to talk when you get home.” No reply and finally a while after 11 he calls me. The second I asked about their (what I’m tempted to call a date) evening and make a comment “sounds romantic. I wish I was there,” he blows up at me.
Now we’ve been dating almost two months and were only dating officially for two weeks (unofficially adds two more weeks) before it became long-distance. I haven’t seen him. We’ve had 3 arguments counting this one…but still him blowing up at me doesn’t feel right.
Now what this has turned into is a gimongous battle. I’ve been so mistreated but here I am. It’s hard to give up even when this little voice is telling me that I probably don’t want to be in this relationship especially when that girl will be there in August and he won’t be leaving till January possibly. Added in special is that despite what he had said all along when it truly comes to me hanging out with a guy friend I am not allowed to or he will dump me. Supposedly his reason is because the one guy I’m talking about got my number from my ex, but I did meet this guy and talk to him before (we have a ton in common). It may be slightly sketchy…I’m not sure what it sounds like to you dear reader but I truly think this girl sounds like nothing but needy and sketchy.
I don’t have guy friends (not ones I hangout with because I’m always in a relationship and it never seemed right), but I think I need some. I want to see how he handles it, but it seems that he can’t handle it. He can go out on the beach with some brokenhearted girl for 3-4 hours one evening, but I can’t go get coffee with a guy friend.
Right now I kind of feel like I shouldn’t let this drag on. Maybe I need to just end it and get out of it.
annnddd I miss my confidant/friend now boyfriend, N. Long-distance relationships are funny things and they are often hard to balance. It seems like each person must call or text at the right time to remind the other that they are thinking of them.
On the other side of life I need to stop smoking. If my parents had any idea they would die. Plus it is unattractive and disgusting. Kissing a smoker isn’t something I prefer to do, and I assume others feel the same, so I would rather not be a smoker as I enjoy kissing (okay not really my logic but yeah smoking is nasty). Along with that are all the unhealthy side effects and the fact that I have allergies anyway.
I have 4 more left and I am planning on not buying anymore. Also, I am sure my friends are sick of me smoking when I am around them. Out is the only time to smoke since I don’t have a job yet and live with parents.
Living with parents…. really doesn’t work. Not sure how people stand it. Especially hard after not living here, (at home) for more then 3 weeks, for over a year.
So of all the dumb people in the world I may have the worst one living in my apartment. My used-to-be-uber-smart-about-guys roomie is dating an asshole and when he got dishonorable discharge from the Navy he came to live with us. On a stupidly drunken night my other roomie and I told her it would be fine (seriously a smart move to ask when drunk).
So, now he is here and we can’t stand him. I probably dislike him more then my other roomie, as he has been rude to me and my boyfriend, as well, for no reason at all (particularly on my boyfriends part). I don’t understand people like this. Why be rude and not like someone when you hardly know them?… Going out isn’t even that fun anymore because I’m always worried about what they are going to say or do next.
Possibly I’m letting them bother me too much, but this guy is an asshole. Also, he is just living off of my roommate (he’s dating) anyway and she is too dumb to wake up and see that. Besides this I’ve heard them twice now when he’s freaked out and been absolutely nasty to her (I mean horrid names and no respect whatsoever) and she is just like settle down and leaves the room. Okay. Good way to handle a fight/someone psychotic, but don’t date someone who calls you a cunt. Can’t she wake up and see what an ass-hole-ish bum he is??
